That's a lie. I couldn't put into a few short words how miserable, depressing, and just down-right horrible my morning was. I should've known from the start that today was going to start off bad the instance I woke up in a pool of vomit that belonged to my ailing dog along with the constant buzzing of my alarm clock which was two, TWO, hours late...now how did that happen? First I was confused, then I was angry, and then...I just got up and did the only thing I could do; take a shower and throw on my work clothes. Oh, but the bad luck didn't stop there. I walked out only to notice a closet with only one piece of clothing hanging from the rack; a bright red cape with crystal piping. It was part of my Halloween costume in 08' and trust me for one second there I actually contemplated throwing it on and making my way down 5th avenue with not one care in the world. But no I decided to sneak into my roommates room and just snatch one of her outfits, I knew she wouldn't miss it. I was already 2 and a half hours late but my stomach reached the point in which it was basically eating itself; I was starving. As I walked to the fridge, I imagined grabbing my leftovers from the other night but once I opened the fridge both me and my stomach were dissappointed. Nothing but one slice of aged American cheese stuck to the bottom of the trays was left in my fridge. I stood in front of my fridge for a good minute until it really sunk in that I had absolutely no food to eat. So, I did a quick prayer and picked up the cheese and ate it like it was a five-star meal. Too bad I immediatley threw up once the cheese entered my mouth. Hey, you can't blame a girl for trying?
I was already two and a half hours late so I ran down the stares of my apartment complex and once I got down to the street I made an attempt to flag down a taxi. And it worked. This was the moment when I thought my luck was starting to "look up" as some might say; oh boy was I wrong. I told the taxi driver to "step on it" and he did. He was going a little too fast but that didn't stop this one beat up honda to cut us off and almost cause us to have an accident. My life didn't even flash before my eyes, the only thing on my mind was, "I'm defintly going to get fired." Ten minutes later I finally reached my desk at work only to see one red note in the middle of my stacks of work that read, "Come see me, ASAP -Trudy"I lugged my feet to my boss' door while I thought to myself, "I'm defintly getting fired" so I knocked on her door and twisted the doorknob with the little faith I had into thinking I was keeping my job. "You're fired." My toes weren't even in the door when I heard these two words...way to rip the bandaid right off Trudy. "Yeah I'm sorry we're having major cuts and your position didn't make it...On the bright side though, you can have the rest of my bagel!" She sat there smiling believing her own bullshit that I couldn't possibly be as mad right now because she offered me her bagel! Oh, how sweet of her seriously right after I'm told I'm fired I just love a good 2 hour old bagel...HALF a bagel I mean, it's not even a full bagel!! So I did what any normal person did and told her to shove that half bagel up hers while I proceeded to flip every piece of furniture in her office. Okay, I'm not the strongest person so I might of just kicked a few things since they were too heavy to flip and just screamed out random curse words because I couldn't think of anything witty to say to her. It was a train wreck.
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